Technology Sucks

When I got home last night at 9 pm, my lumbering body bore the full weight of a horrendous week. My footfall was heavy, my head was pounding and at the risk of sounding pathetic, I was plumb worn out. Even with my drug store purchased magnifying reading glasses. I couldn't read my computer screen by 10 pm. Giving up on accomplishing anything of value, I sat on the couch, poured myself a glass of wine and turned on the TV. Within minutes, I was fast asleep--and there I awoke at 5 am, my wine untouched and the TV playing an infomercial.

I resorted to the bed where Fang labored in a snoring slumber. I tossed and turned until 8:30 am when I finally got up. I poured myself a cup of coffee and logged onto my computer. I have a financial forecast due on Monday morning which requires a fair amount of work that needs to be completed between then and now. I tried to log onto the network. My password (and variations thereof) failed 12 times. I dashed off an e-mail to the CIO of our company. This young chap can be relied on to respond to e-mails day and night. I am convinced he has surgically applied his Blackberry to his right hand which means I can count on him to respond to me. And an hour later, he did. He was in the UK. He suspected my password had been locked out. Alas, he was without his computer so he was unable to help me. To his credit, he did copy one of his IT staff to help me. I waited. No reply. Panic was rising in me. I had so much to do and I was helpless.

By noon, I was beyond panicked and I was losing valuable time. It was clear I wasn't going to accomplish this from home. I started to evaluate my options where I would be assured of network connectivity. The NYC office was the easiest to get to, but when I abandoned my residency of that space, my access keys were confiscated. I wouldn't be able to get in. I considered our Jersey City space but the time it would take to drive through the Holland Tunnel would probably take an hour; the subway and PATH train on a weekend schedule would be longer. Truthfully, it would take me 45 minutes to drive to Connecticut. And so I did.

As I walked out of the apartment, Fang (seeing my barely concealed aggravation) said, "Please don't drive angry."

Oh but I did drive angry. I was fucking seething as I drove 75 mph on highway 95 towards Connecticut. I was weaving between cars like a drunken pirate. I was beyond frustrated knowing I had already lost half a day twiddling my thumbs.

I walked into the office at 1:15 to a chorus of construction workers with their whirring drills and hammers and saws. A fellow that I recognized as the office project manager approached me. "Do you work here?" he asked. I produced ID and he allowed me in, apologizing for the noise but indicating that they had items on their punch list to complete. No worries, I replied, I have a list to complete too.

I logged in and started to work in earnest. I completed 60% of the work I needed to complete. And before I knew it, it was 6:30 and I wanted to go home. Before I left the office, I dashed off an urgent e-mail to one of the CIO's IT staff to help me establish my remote VPN. I have more work to finish tomorrow and I really, really don't want to drive to Connecticut again tomorrow to finish it. My mood will be positively murderous if I have to.

And dontcha know. because I must have the star of the cursed above my head, my drive back into Manhattan was fraught with a horrendous traffic jam in the Bronx. I just arrived in this cruel borough and in a purely girl moment, I had a teary "I hate my life" breakdown moment on the corner of 155th Street and Broadway. Even the transients ignored me. Can anyone be more pathetic? Yeah, the answer would be no.

Technology is an incredible marvel. When it works, it's wonderous. But when it doesn't, God help us.