32 Ounces of Joy

You know, if you're going to give in to the calories that equate a classic steak meal, you ought to give in to a meal at Peter Lugers. Peter Lugers is amongst the best steak houses in the region (although I'd rank Keen's in Manhattan a close second). They say the Brooklyn location is the best. I would have liked to offer debate on this point but the Brooklyn location is booked up until next May. So we went to their newest location in Great Neck, New York (this is on Long Island--Caryl knows where this is).

We went in already prepared to order. We decided to split a Caesar salad. Four slices of the bacon appetizer at $3.00 a slice (and hello--let me repeat: BACON appetizer). The classic 32 ounce porterhouse for two (that includes the bone, let me add). A side of classic German potatoes. A side of creamed spinach. A bottle of pinot noir. OK, now we can eat!

The Caesar salad is frankly, pretty average. Which is disappointing. Most steakhouses nail the classic Caesar. However, the pinot is sublime. It is perfection.


The bacon makes me want to slap my ass and call myself Sally. Fucking A. This is swine at its finest (despite the weirdly phallic photographic look of the remains here).


The meat arrives, already sectioned from the bone and sliced. The waiter doses my plate up like I am a child.


After sampling the fare, I have a distinct opinion on the foodstuffs before us. The meat--ordered medium--arrives at the correct temperature, but is a little tough in texture. And dare I say, under seasoned? I even try some of the famous Peter Luger steak sauce to add some flavor. The potatoes were well done and lacking in seasoning, so I had to add salt. Fang told me they were classic kartoffel, but these were like dry home fries. The creamed spinach had a smooth texture and nice flavor, but it begged a dash of freshly grated nutmeg. I think that would have perfected this dish. I even told the maitre'd the same thing when we left, but I had the distinct feeling he really didn't give a shit about my recommendations. And why should he? The dining room was packed and they'll never want for customers.

In the end, it was a fine meal and the service at the hands of our Eastern European waiter was superb. But for a $200 meal, you'd want a bit more flavor in the end product. Right?

I know. I'm going straight to hell.