Today was the day of our project presentation. This presentation was a working draft, the first round of what our finished project should aspire to be. We were presenting it to the group of our peers for their questions, feedback and fine tuning. It is a little intimidating. I am nervous and am feeling powerfully inadequate.
I awake at 5:30 am and review the presentation. We've split it into four segments and we've each been given our part to present. I am leading off the presentation, setting the stage for our project work, discussing the objective and the environment that we are building this project. I am comfortable with the material thanks to many long distance conference calls with the project sponsor in the UK. Still, to make it interesting, I want to intersperse my presentation with an anecdote of our first meeting of our sponsor. I rehearse and fine tune. It's flowing. It's also 7:30 am and I go downstairs to meet my group to rehearse before our 8:30 am presentation.
The Owl/Fox and the Fox/Donkey are already there, preparing individually. The Uber Fox is nowhere to be seen. I review my notes with the available duo and we're all on the same page. 8:30 comes around and the room gathers for the presentation. The Uber Fox has not shown up. I am feeling distressed. This looks to me like an outright diss from an arrogant team member.
No matter, for we need to start. I have done my breathing techniques gleaned in the previous days class. I am feeling confident and focused. I stand in front of the group. I introduce my team. I introduce the chair that should be holding the Uber Fox. And then I go blank. I look around the room for what seems like minutes (I later learn it is maybe two seconds and one of my colleagues told me they assumed it was a dramatic pause). And then I focused my gaze on a colleague from Holland who has a warm face. I found my focus. I start.
I give my opening. I tell my anecdote (complete with imitation of the sponsor with his Scottish brogue). It gets laughs. I go through the objectives and steps. Then I pass off to the Fox/Donkey. The presentation flows. People respond. By the time we get to the third portion of the presentation (the portion that the Uber Fox should be giving), the Owl/Fox steps up and starts to present. Three minutes into this section, the Uber Fox dramatically enters the room. He looks like he just rolled out of bed and grins boyishly at the group.
I am fucking seething. I want to smack him in his head with a crowbar.
He steps up and finishes his part of the presentation. We wrap up and answer questions. I can barely look at him.
After we've finished, I know I have to confront him. The other two in my group seem indifferent, but I regard his arrogant indifference to the group dynamic as unacceptable. The day passes and I miss the chance to approach him. The evening transcends into a dinner where the UberFox is fixated on dominating the CEO. And on the walk back to the hotel, the Uber Fox walks along with a triad of his followers so he's not to be deterred.
As we enter the hotel, they disengage and here and I interject myself. "I need to talk to you, " I say.
He agrees and I pull him off to a quiet corner of the room. I get close to him, just enough to invade his space and I look him in the eyes. "I think you showing up late today was incredible irresponsible and careless. I was...very disappointed in you. It sent a terrible message. " There. I said it.
Long pause. Uber Fox looks shocked. He apologizes. Pause. Then he lets go with both barrels.
He makes excuses not knowing the timetable for the presentation. He tells me that I am not contributing adequately to this project. He says no one's work load can be compared the incredible burden being carried by the Owl/Fox and I should be doing more. He says I let the group down by not attending a meeting in London in May that set the stage for this project launch. Blah. Blah. Blah.
He's turned it on me. He's being verbally hurtful. I just stand squarely in his space and stare into his face and I show no emotion, no fear. Most of all, I offer him no fucking apologies. I have nothing to apologize for.
Pause.
We engage in a debate which goes back and forth. We agree to certain changes going forward. I am still sort of pissed, but he hugs me and buys me a nightcap at the bar where the group has gathered. We smile at each other now that we have some semblance of a consensus, but come on. I know better. He epitomizes that rare breed of fox that expects others to glory in the light of their talent and to serve their ends. And don't fool yourself for the Uber Fox will throw their own mama under the bus before they sacrifice themselves. It is a special kind of talent, for sure, just a ruthless kind.
Anyway, I finished the nightcap and slipped away.
And here I reflect on the final and most critical phase of the project ahead of us. I'll do what I need to, but as for the Uber Fox? He's on his own.
Greens Gotta Be Spicy
- Chicken And Waffles
- Summit, NJ, NJ, United States
- Well, I'm Damn Fascinating.
3 comments:
You go, girl with your bad self! Good for you for standing your ground. That ability to turn things around on your attacker is a very irritating trait. My husband has it, despite his complete lack of uber-ness.
If I find out I have offended someone, I am mortified. I apologize profusely and beg forgiveness. It boggles my mind when others don't do the same if they have offended me. Then I have to wonder, is it me? Do I not have the right to be offended in the situation?
Yeah, I agree with you, jennifer. That guy had...let's say MOXY...for trying to turn the situation around on you, C&W. You're obviously very good at your job. Doesn't sound like he has much of a future.
Thanks for your gracious support, girls, but there is a hard truth here with the Uber Fox. He is a talented and intelligent player in the company. It is wholly likely he may be running the company one day. Like most brilliant and sort of ruthless people (and those are the ones who usually succeed quickly), he's a lone wolf who will interact with others as directed, but who prefers to blaze their own path. They are direct, blunt, disinterested in small talk and highly political. At dinner last night, he confidentally stood at the elbow of the CEO, sat next to him at dinner and dominated the conversation. I admire the supreme self confidence, ego and chutzpah that takes. So our little interaction was a good case study of how someone like this can manipulate a failing on their part and direct it back on someone else. It's an insufferable gift and sometimes the hallmark of a leader.
Post a Comment