Whoooooo Boy. The Christmas onslaught has officially begun.

Every store, restaurant and venue you wander into has Burl Ives and Bing Crosby blaring from the rafters. Every store front is bedecked with lights and tinsel and gold and evergreen. The commercials on TV have started their jingling jangling holiday bleating. My mailbox is crammed full of holiday catalogs as well as letters from every charity on the planet requesting donations. And the non stop pressure to start holiday shopping. I despair of holiday shopping.

It's as if all this hoo haw erupted overnight. I mean, that big gold reindeer flanking the lobby of the office wasn't here when I wandered out last week for the Thanksgiving break. 'Tis the freaking season.

Please don't get me wrong. I adore the holidays. I love the big dazzling tree in Rockefeller Center and the ice rink glistening in its shadow. I love the brilliant department store windows with their elaborate and fanciful themes (Note: This year's holiday window at Barney's plays homage to Andy Warhol. That Simon Doonan is a genius). I love the nutmegy whiff of egg nog and the good cheer that lightens the human soul. I like the sappy TV movies that make you weepy because someone still has a reason to believe in Santa Claus. I am totally down with all the goodwill and festivities and warmth. It's the retail end of the holiday that leaves me cold.

Plowing through Macy's at Herald Square anytime between now and 9 pm on Christmas Eve is outright suicidal. You truly take your life in your hands when you venture in through those revolving doors. I'm cynical on the whole notion of ostentatious gift giving anyway, the fear of finding the right gift and often overspending for no reason at all. We all own so much stuff. We have too much apparel, too many gadgets, far too much bounty. It's a blessing, to be sure, that most of us want for nothing. But there's a reason why you tax your brain trying to find the right gift for someone; it likely means they already have everything they could possibly ever need. Frankly, the gift of time with people you enjoy is far better than any gadget or doodad that can be trotted out in festive wrapping.

I doubt this diatribe will have any affect on the largesse of holiday gifting that we'll all indulge in. And the retailers do have to earn their living. From my way of thinking, we should be putting gift money into charitable causes. Donate your time in a homeless shelter or the SPCA or a senior center as a gift to someone you know would appreciate it. Send a soldier in Iraq a holiday care package on a friend's behalf. Make a donation in someone's name to a cause they hold dear. I know it sounds cheesy, but I would greatly value a gesture of that sort, knowing others who need it will benefit from the goodwill.

That's what it's all about anyway, right?