It May Well Be Blockage

It's been incredibly hard for me to write anything of substance for the past few weeks. I don't necessarily believe in the concept of writer's block but what I do know is this: Every night I have sat down in front a keyboard and conjured deeply to find something to write about that didn't discuss work or shit commutes or the slow migration of a much anticipated season. I wanted to find joyous things to convey but I couldn't summon them. In the end, I had bupkis.

Truth be told, I have stories.

-My amorous morning garage attendant Ahmed has migrated to another gig in a competing garage across town in Harlem. He calls me every other day on my morning commute, muttering suggestive overtures. I like to think it keeps me young.

-The last of the "Salt" film crews are still lingering, repairing all the damage they caused to the walls of the 4th floor.

-I've developed a friendship with the morning dog walkers along Broadway and 155th. My latest favorite is a boxer named Tyrone who (alas) won't stay still for a photograph. He's a feisty critter.

-It snowed last week for about an hour. It was surreal.

-I booked a trip to California at the end of May for the annual family visit ritual. I am referring to it as "Guilt Trip 2009!"

-I discovered that I might actually like sushi.

-I watched "My Cousin Vinnie" again for the 80th time and the owl/shotgun scene still makes me laugh like nobody's business.

-I'm sort of hating the dysfunction that is Twitter. It gets overloaded far too easily, like a fragile Victorian in need of a fainting couch.

-We're spending Easter in Queens with the Aunts and I am going to make an Easter Bunny carrot cake. It will have a soft round body and will be embellished with coconut hair, reposing in coconut green grass and wearing licorice whiskers. When I described this vision to Fang, he said, "Make sure you have a back up plan."

-I know I will sound heartless but thank goodness the blind guy on "American Idol" went home this week. A sweet guy and clearly, a talented musician but when he was off-key, it was painful.

-I have vivid work dreams every night. Nearly every person in the company has shown up in these dreams over the last few weeks. Several of them are toting very large weapons.

-Menopause is a bitch. I am not loving the hot flash.

-I learned today that I am number one in the MLB baseball pool for the company. It's early yet in the season, of course, but it's always nice to be number one (if only for a week).

-D Minor is the saddest chord of all. I listened to a lot of music this week and well, I'm conclusive on this point.

Perhaps my vigor is returning.