As usual I got home late from work, we ordered Japanese take out and I set up my laptop in the dining room to follow up on some work. Our dining room opens onto the living room where we have an oversized flat screen TV. Fang flipped between SportsCenter, a live broadcast of the Mets game and a screening of "The Miracle Worker" on TCM. We both got caught up in "The Miracle Worker" (that Anne Bancroft was SO good) and before I know it, it''s the end of the film. Helen Keller goes on a hand-spelling spree, blurts "Water!" and embraces her teacher. Fang and I are both in copious tears. That's so wrong, but I couldn't help it.Suddenly, our doorbell rings. Well trained, I peer through the peep hole to see who is on the other side. In rounded reflection, I see a slim African American woman smiling at me from the other side. I open the door and the woman extends a hand. Before I can say a word, she starts talking.
She introduces herself as Artrice, our upstairs neighbor from apartment 5A. Apartment 5A is the culprit who allows their bathtub to overflow. I am a little thrown off--I thought these tenants had been evicted ages ago. She starts talking before I can speak. "Your husband knows me. I'm the woman who lives upstairs--you know, the one with the husband who falls asleep in the bathtub. The man who causes the waterfalls in your place.You complained about me."
Oh, shit. Is she going to beat me up now for narcing her out to building management? How does my fucking husband know her? I'm so tired from work and I'm awash in the afterglow of sadness because of this sappy movie on TCM. Let's get to the point. Where is this going? I reinforce for a fight.
Fang walks up. They exchange pleasantries. But what does she WANT?
It soon becomes clear. She lost her wallet on the subway and wants to borrow $10. Seriously. In New York, they call that chutzpah. I give her a crisp twenty; she dithers about change but I tell her to keep it. I'm so seriously confused that I can't commit when she tries to establish a date when she thinks she'll pay me back. Truth is, if I lend money to people, I never expect to see it again. And I was prepared to depart with a twenty spot just to dispatch this intruder.
I am also surprised that she would consider us friends, given the water overflow episodes. She filled the pauses with humorous excuses about her errant husband's inconsiderate water flowing habits. I just want her to leave.
She soon left and I stared at Fang. He gave me an equally confused look in exchange.
Is that weird or what?
5 comments:
You may have been scammed, girlfriend. We had a man come to our door (granted, we're not in an apartment building, and are easier to fool in this way) saying he was our neighbor from "the house on the corner of Wilson and Hudson," which is about six or seven houses away from us. I have never seen the people who live there, so who am I to question? He said "My wife took the ATM card with her today to work, and I must get my son's allergy medicine from the pharmacy so he can take it before 6:00 pm, but my wife won't be home till 8:00. I'm so embarrassed to have to ask this, but I'm trying to find someone in the neighborhood who can lend me $20. I got $8 from your next door neighbor, and just need $12 more."
Like you, all I had was a $20 so I gave it to him. "Oh thank you. I'll bring it back tonight when my wife gets home. I sure do appreciate it!"
We never saw him again. We later heard that he'd been all over our neighborhood with this story. Of course, he's NOT the neighbor from the house on at the corner of Wilson and Hudson.
Live and learn. And let me know if your money comes back. ;-)
Oh. My. I thought they got kicked out already. Keep your towels handy.
That's just totally weird..and to think she had the balls to come downstairs and ask for money. If I had been here I'd been so embarrassed. What a loser.
You should have told her to make sure it was used for subway fare and not to pay the water bill.
Excellent advice, all. As for this person's true identity, Fang confirmed it. They had met a few times in the elevator so it's legit. Still, I have to marvel at her...balls....to ask us for money when she must know we're not exactly big fans of our upstairs neighbors.
Jane--I found out today that they did not get kicked out--they were put on a five year warning...whatever the hell that means.
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