Saturday, May 03, 2008

One Foot In the Grave

The letter from AARP came yesterday. Welcome, it exclaimed, you are a year older and ripe for membership for senior benefits. What the fuck? I was outraged. And then I remembered. Today is my 46th birthday. Holy fuck. maybe I really am old.

Mathematically anyway. I don't feel old. If I consider how I feel physically, I am 30. If I consider how I feel mentally, I am 12. And if I consider how I feel sexually, let's shoot for the equivalent of a teenage boy trapped in a warm bread truck. Yeah, that ain't exactly ringing senior citizen ready for discount coupons and reduced portion dinners served at 4 pm. Fuck AARP.

With that perspective clearly in mind, I slept in late today (that would be until 7:00 am). I sat on the couch and drank a cup of coffee. I did some sit ups. I showered and ate some cantaloupe. And then I took the subway downtown. I walked the streets. I deflected a group of very enthusiastic Japanese tourists. I had the grey hair coming in colored blonde. I had a facial. I tried on many pairs of shoes that I would never actually buy. I fantasized about sex on the subway (and it was a long ride given the MTA's sporadic service on the weekends). And then Fang took me to dinner (although I sense he would have rather have stayed home and watched The Kentucky Derby).

I picked the eatery, a favorite venue in Midtown called Artisinal. It is noted for its cheese--in fact, the premises harbor a cheese cave. Fang calls me a "Puta de Quesa." Rightly--I do love cheese.

We started with a car service to Midtown. Followed by grilled octopus topped by a frisee salad. Chased with a basket of gougeres. A dash of steak tartare
Bring on the entrees: Skirt steak pommes frite with watercress salad.Chicken grilled under a brick. Hmm. Should we have dessert? Not while there is cheese to be enjoyed!We settled on the cheese: a fine manchego, a musty Stilton and a Montgomery Cheddar partnered with a platter of walnuts drenched in honey. But cheese is nothing without wine. At the recommendation of fromagier, we selected the following pairings: a flight of Serra de Azeitao, a Malbec Jelu, a Muscat Vin de Glaciere Bonny Doon and a Muscat de Riversaltes.That seems the best way to ring in one's golden years.

10 comments:

Soul Reporter said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! Don't worry, Ms. Thang, you look freaking great, age is but a number. As for the AARP correspondence, do what I do; rip it up, throw it in the trash and pretend you never saw it. It works for me.

Jane said...

No teenage boy ever had your glam, baby. Happy birthday!

Unknown said...

Hippo Birdie Two Ewe! Hippo Birdie Two Ewe!

Sounds like you celebrated in style and I would expect nothing less. That restaurant looks like something I have dreamed about. Mmmmm, cheese!

caryl said...

Happy Birthday! Of course you're not old-I'm older than you and I'm not old!!

What a great day you had. Did Fang call you a cheese whore? Well, THAT passion never came up in chat.

Rock on, girlfriend! If the AARP saw you, they would assume there was some mistake!

amynoroom said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRLY!!!!!!!

mary said...

Forget AARP, so your tastes have graduated from the days of Chick-O-Stix, Red Vines, and Big Hunks!

Hey, where's MoreWines. I kind of wanted a review of the wines you selected.

caryl said...

btw: really diggin the necklace!

morewines said...

Happy B-Day.

You won't be ready for the Red Hat for another four years. :D

Drink some good wine to celebrate.

morewines said...

Mary as for the wines I can't
comment. Haven't had any of them.

I had several Malbecs. But not that
one. I have had several Muscats including a couple of Randall Graham's (don't call him Randy), Bonney Doon, but not that one. Nor the last one on the list.

C&W
Did you ever get a bottle of
the Viogner I suggested.
Well if you haven't I hope
you do before it's time for
that Red Hat.
http://www.redhatsocietystore.com/istar.asp?a=500

Here some music for your B-Day.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=rpg-pPFbk3c

Julie said...

Muscat....mmmmm....

Happy belated birthday, girlfriend! I didn't realize the AARP sent stuff when you turned 46...I'm a year older than you (high five, Caryl!) and still haven't received anything from the bastards. Maybe they know my rep...

Hope you had a wonderful day!
xoxoxo
J.