There's only one thing that I will ever have in common with the 1970s German band Boney M: I can't stand the rain.
I adore a hot and languid summer day, with thick air, syrupy humidity and the excuse to wear only a tank top, shorts and bare feet. To me, that's the ideal weather condition. I also like snow and welcome the excuse to swaddle myself in heavy wool and fuzzy boots. The rain? Well, that's a whole new kettle of fish. I utterly deplore rain. Spare me its beneficial returns. It depresses the bejesus out of me.
Today, we have been pelted with an onslaught of steady rain and gale force winds since the dawn broke. I had to go to the Upper West Side today and got caught in heinous weather conditions before I could retreat to the nether sanctuary of the subway. I was soaked to the skin from the waist down, my jeans glued to my body like a piece of Saran Wrap. The stalwart umbrella I had with me was completely eviscerated, resulting in an undignified trashing in a public receptacle. When rain conditions are like that I often yell out (to no one in particular) "Fuck you, you dreadful rat bastard shitstorm of rain!" It only succeeds in making people move away from me quickly and results, alas, not in the decreasing intensity of the weather conditions.
I think I need to do some cooking because bitching about the rain is far too tedious.
Greens Gotta Be Spicy
- Chicken And Waffles
- Summit, NJ, NJ, United States
- Well, I'm Damn Fascinating.
3 comments:
So this would be a bad time to mention the baseball park sunburn I got today? I like rain. It's cozy, particularly when there's an afternoon free for cooking. Glad you salvaged the day.
Sunburn?! Jane, this is not gentle Summer's Eve type rain. This is hard slashing penetrating rain that is angry and cold and vigilant. I know you're from Oregon and all and can forgive rain its trespasses, but these showers truly defied any kind of nostalgia.
What a fucking shitty day this has been. Of course I had to go to the grocery store, as well as other errands that had to be done since I was out of town yesterday. I almost fell asleep in church,(not good when you are the music director) and my hair looks like I stuck my finger in a wall socket. I'm married to a man who can't get his fucking lazy ass off the sofa to get his "bubble water", so what do I do? I, of course, get it for him because I'm such a son-of-a-bitch idiot and I don't want to hear his whining.......
Thank you for letting me get this off my chest. I'll go have a drink now and toast to you.
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