You know that old joke--why do New Yorkers wear black? They're waiting for something darker to come along.

Jokes aside, people wear a lot of black in this town, year round. But the breadth of the embrace became very clear today when I got on the subway and all I could see were a series of heads lost in a sea of black clothing. Black jackets and pants and scarves and hats. This is precisely the time of year when we feel the gloom the most. It's dark at 5 pm. The skies are murky. The trees are shedding their greenery. The concrete of the city is more pronounced and gritty than ever. It's depressing. Would a little color hurt you people?

Besides the continued embrace of the dark clothing, this is also the time of year my least favorite fashion trend makes its' annual reappearance. The puffy quilted coat. This heinous wardrobe eyesore never seems to go out of style. It may keep the wearer warm, but it would make even a supermodel look like the Michelin Man. It's unflattering in the extreme, yet every cold season, people trot this sleeping bag with arms out of their deep storage. I despise the puffy jacket with a passion.

Likewise the wool caps with the chin straps and the fuzzy yarn balls on the top of them. They're like something straight out of Dr. Suess. Ladies, this is when the term "age inappropriate" applies. If you're over 15, you should not wear a wool hat with bear ears on them. Or fuzzy balls or strings of yarn that look like pink dreadlocks. Fang always thinks those yarn balls at the top of the peaked stocking caps look like a fuse that needs to be lit. I love that image, but I'm a bit twisted that way.

And Oy! Today I saw a woman wearing leg warmers over her jeans. The return of black leggings was freakish enough, but the leg warmers bunched around her ankles made me want to tackle her right there on 5th Avenue and strip those dreadful things from her calves. Where are the Glamour fashion police when you need them? I could only pass slowly by, giving her the most pained expression while glancing at her calves, then at her face and then back to her calves so she could see I was really trying to help, but she strutted by, blissfully unaware.

I'm still split on rubber rain boots. The classic Wellington always looks good (if not a bit of the fox and hound set), but I saw a woman the other day wearing pink leopard spotted ones with yellow trim. They matched her hair. Well, parts of her hair. It looked kind of good in a Betsey Johnson way, but that's not a good look for everyone.

Naturally, the Ugg boots are making a reappearance. What aptly named footwear. God help us if the mukluks come back.

And as for the sea of black clothing. I'm as guilty as those I criticize. I admit it, black makes my ass look smaller. Still, I'm making a concerted efforts to infuse color on top of the basic black palette. It certainly does make you feel a little brighter during the dark days of winter.

There was a woman who got on the subway today who had fiery red hair and she was wearing a light green tweed coat. She had a thick layer of red lipstick on which lit her whole face up. She lifted my gloom almost immediately.